kheru2006 (kheru2006) wrote,
kheru2006
kheru2006

This is Malaysia - What A True Malaysian Should Know


NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR HAIR LOSS: Ajinomoto

NATIONAL INSTANT FOOD : Maggi Mee

NATIONAL BREAKFAST : Nasi Lemak

NATIONAL LUNCH : Nasi Ayam

NATIONAL SUPPER : Roti Canai & Teh Tarik

NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR BEING LATE: Traffic Jam

NATIONAL CONDOM: None. Most Malaysians still feel embarrassed buying condoms. So they rushed into a 7-11, hurriedly grab the nearest pack, any pack, pay and leave before the cashier can even blink an eye.

NATIONAL FRUIT FOR INDUCING MENSTRUATION : Pineapple

NATIONAL APHRODISIAC DRINK: Stout. Many Malaysian men swear by it. But then after a few pints they start swearing at everything.. .

NATIONAL FAKE ILLNESS FOR GETTING MC (MEN): Food Poisoning

NATIONAL FAKE ILLNESS FOR GETTING MC (WOMEN): Menstrual Pain

NATIONAL EXCUSES GIVEN BY WOMEN WHEN REFUSING SEX: Headache, kids not asleep, maid not asleep, mother-in-law around, early appointment, food not digested yet, aircond not cold enough, aircond too cold, nail polish not dry yet, forgot to take the pill, sleepy, stomach cramps, period, haven ' t remove make-up, haven ' t shower, no water supply, going to watch ' Santa Barbara ', depress, no mood, etc...

NATIONAL EXCUSES GIVEN BY MEN WHEN REFUSING SEX: None. Malaysian men never refuse sex.

NATIONAL CURE FOR DIARRHOEA : Cap Kaki Tiga. Down one bottle with warm water and you are all 'dried up'.

NATIONAL CURE FOR HEADACHES: Panadol. The 'cure for all'. If it fails we have another secret weapon - Tiger Balm.

NATIONAL CURE FOR NAUSEA : Moh Fah Kor.

NATIONAL CURE FOR DIZZINESS: Minyak Angin Cap Kapak.

NATIONAL CAUSE OF DIZZINESS (FOR YUPPIES): Happy Hours.

NATIONAL INSTANT CURE FOR DIZZINESS (FOR YUPPIES): The sight of a police road block.

NATIONAL RICE COOKER : NATIONAL Rice Cooker

NATIONAL RUBBISH DUMP: Anywhere. As long as it is not your house.

NATIONAL MOST MIS-PRONOUNCED NAME: Carrefour. Sometimes even pronounced as Carry 4!

NATIONAL ANSWER FOR 'WHERE ARE YOU'? -on the way.

NATIONAL OFFICIAL TIME FOR BEING LATE -10 minutes

NATIONAL REASON FOR PRICE INCREASE Petrol naik lagi kawan... semua barang pun kena naikler... inclusive chicken meat? :)

NATIONAL REASON FOR PETROL INCREASE Still cheaper than other country la....

NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR CAUSING TRAFFIC JAM: there was accident on the other side of the road.. of
course must slow down and tengok-tengok, kaypoh-kaypoh lah!

NATIONAL REASON WHEN REJECTING INVITATION : 'I got some work to do la..u all go first la..'

NATIONAL REASON FOR COLLAPSED BUILDINGS & LEAKY PARLIAMENT ROOFS: An act of God. definitely nothing to with greased palms and poor quality control. Nope, none whatsoever.

NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR IRRESPONSIBLE POLITICAL STATEMENTS: None. We were misquoted.


NATIONAL MINISTERIAL REASON FOR INCREASING TOLL RATES: Orang cakap mau naik mesti mau naik lah! Lu ingat ini jalan saya punya bapak punya kah?!

NATIONAL REASON FOR HAVING BIG ONION DOMES ON TAXPAYER FUNDED PUBLIC BUILDINGS: dunno. It's not as if we're anywhere near the middle east.

NATIONAL REASON FOR SPURNING BAILOUT PACKAGES FROM FOREIGN CAR COMPANIES: We're about to unveil another badly designed low budget car, which, coupled with our notorious customer service and corporate mismanagement, will see us bankrupt again within the next 5 years. And so we have absolutely no need for the Germans and their silly car-making and market-positioning knowhow, thank you very much.

NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR JUMPING QUEUE (TRAFFIC JAM OR WHAT EVER QUEUE) : everybody doing what lah............

NATIONAL EXCUSE NOT PAYING SAMAN ACCORDING TO DUE DATE: Relax ler... government will give discount one of these days

NATIONAL EXCUSE TO BRIBE (ANY CONDITION) : give them minum kopi lar.......


via Sharifah Khatijah
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