kheru2006 (kheru2006) wrote,

British English vs. Malaysian English

Who says our English is teruk? Just read below - Ours is simple, short,   
concise, straight-to-the-point, effective etc.                             
WHEN GIVING A CUSTOMER BAD NEWS                                           
Britons: I'm sorry, sir, but we don't seem to have the sweater you want in
your size, but if you give me a moment, I can call the other outlets for   
Malaysians: No stock.                                                     
RETURNING A CALL                                                           
Britons: Hello, this is John Smith. Did anyone call for me a few moments   
Malaysians: Hello, who call?                                               
ASKING SOMEONE TO MAKE WAY                                                 
Britons: Excuse me, I would like to get by. Would you please make way?     
Malaysians: S-kew me.                                                     
WHEN ASKING FOR PERMISSION                                                 
Britons: Excuse me, but do you think it would be possible for me to enter 
through this door?                                                         
Malaysians: (pointing at the door) Can ah?                                 
WHEN ENTERTAINING                                                         
Britons: Please make yourself right at home.                               
Malaysians: No need shy shy one lah!                                       
WHEN DOUBTING SOMEONE                                                     
Britons: I don't recall you giving me the money.                           
Malaysians: Where got?                                                     
WHEN DECLINING AN OFFER                                                   
Britons: I would prefer not to do that, if you don't mind.                 
Malaysians: Don't want lah.                                               
WHEN ASKING SOMEONE TO LOWER THEIR VOICE.                                 
Britons: Excuse me, but could you please lower your voice? I'm trying to   
concentrate over here.                                                     
Malaysians: Shut up lah!                                                   
WHEN ASSESSING A TIGHT SITUATION.                                         
Britons: We seem to be in a bit of a predicament at the moment..           
Malaysians: Die lah!!                                                     
WHEN SOMEONE DID SOMETHING WRONG                                           
Britons: This isn't the way to do it. Here, let me show you.               
Malaysians: Like that also don't know how to do!                           
WHEN ONE IS ANGRY                                                         
Britons: Would you mind not disturbing me?                                 
Malaysians: Celaka you!
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